“I thrive on my confidence, and I felt like it was scarring me”: Kangana Ranaut reveals why she went for an eight-day spiritual course

2019 has been quite an eventful year for Kangana Ranaut. Her Directorial debut, Manikarnika, not only received rave reviews but also did well at box office, both domestic and overseas. The film was extremely special for her and she put her heart and soul into the portrayal of Rani Laxmibai.

But the journey wasn’t easy one as Kangana had to pick up directorial reigns midway to make sure the film met expectations. Recently, she attended an eight-day meditation program which required extreme discipline and yoga expertise. In a recent conversational with a leading daily, Kangana was asked what motivated her to take up such a challenging course, to which she replied,
“I was kind of harrowed with the whole Manikarnika experience. My director abandoned the project. All of this came on to me with such a force. I wanted to get into direction. But it didn’t have to come like a tsunami, at gunpoint — directing in a situation, where everyone is feeling unsure.

When the film finally came out, and came out good, people loved it. But there was so much negativity from the backlog that came with it. I thrive on my confidence. I don’t know how to function without it. It’s the fuel of my personality. When I feel wronged, taken for a ride, I feel like a meek person. I felt like that.

These people were altogether bullying me. Did you see the horse episode [a clip leaked from the making of the film]? This is mockery. A girl has pulled off these stunts for the first time. And there is this whole system working against it openly? I felt like it was scarring me. I have been associated with a guru’s ashram in Coimbatore, and this [retreat] was happening, exactly what I needed.”
After the much-needed spiritual getaway, Kangana is gearing up for release of her next film, Mental Hai Kya.